Flightster
Drinking Dilemma: To Mix or not to Mix
- by Bobby Laurie
- on October 28th, 2010
- 18 Comments
Flight Attendant: “Hello, welcome aboard, can I get you anything to drink while you’re getting settled?”
Passenger: “Yes, thanks, I’ll have a guava juice with a splash of tomato juice, and a shot of ginger-ale.”
Flight Attendant: “I’m so sorry, we don’t have guava juice.”
Passenger: “Oh.. Wow, you don’t? Okay then, I’ll just have a coke.”
Flight Attendant: “Okay, great, I’ll be right back.”
Passengers drink requests always baffle me. It’s almost as if a passengers palette changes the second they walk through the boarding door. Being a Flight Attendant is fun because of the different people you get to meet and the intense case study you get to witness of the American public (and or foreigners traveling through).
It’s safe to say that daily, there is at least one drink request that requires me to ask, “I’m so sorry, can you say that again? You want milk mixed with coke?”
That’s right. Milk and coke. What? I’ve never heard of such a thing. Apparently, according to my passenger, mixing the two drinks together creates a hydrating beverage to help cure a hangover and give you an energy boost. I didn’t buy his reasoning. I also didn’t know how much of each drink to add to his glass. So I brought him both drinks and watched the magic happen. He filled his glass about three quarters of the way high with coke, shook up the container of milk and added it to fill his glass. He said it tasted like a “float” would. I’ll take his word for it.
He only wanted me to mix two products together. Sometimes the complexity of a drink order requires a legal size pad to get the instructions right.
“I’ll have a seltzer.. Do you know what that is? Soda Water, or mineral water.. Yes, that, with a splash of cranberry juice, a shot of orange juice, but not if it’s from a can — only from a box please, a twist of lemon and also a lime and one ice cube, not two.. Just one.”
Seriously? So what you really want is a little bit of everything in one glass? That would have been easier to say. That’s not even the worst order I received. I got this one the other day and I had to run to write it down. Ready? Get a cup of coffee.. It’s going to take a while:
“I’ll have a ginger-ale with a little bit of seltzer, a shot of cranberry juice, a little sprite, a lemon and a lime. And, I know this is weird.. Can you mix a half and half in there too. Hold the ice.. No, wait, I’ll have two cubes. Oh! And don’t forget the orange juice as well.”
Okay. I thought I was on candid camera. This order was placed during the pre-departure beverage service. So I’m trying to serve my whole first class cabin while people are pushing me in each direction in the great race for overhead space.
I knelt down to this passenger, blocking the boarding and said.. “I’m sorry, one more time.” Again, they repeated the order. I replied “I think I got it.”
Hell, I know I didn’t have it. But I figured with all of those ingredients, there’s no way they are going to know what’s in it.
I mixed together ginger-ale, seltzer, OJ, cranberry, lemon and lime. Oh yeah, and against my will I added in the half and half. Totally leaving the Sprite out of the picture.
I walked the drink over to the passenger with a smile on my face. I knew I left the Sprite out, but do they? This was the perfect test in my opinion. Once and for all I’ll be able to determine if people really drink this stuff or if they’re just being difficult.
They were just being difficult. They actually asked me, “Oh.. No.. You used 7-Up in here didn’t you? I don’t like 7-Up.” It took everything in me not burst out laughing. I apologized for using 7-Up. I didn’t have enough heart to tell them that wasn’t even Sprite in their drink.
I’m curious though, if you’re one of those travelers with a very specific drink request, do you usually drink that beverage at home? (example: one cube of ice, not two; this mixed with that and 2 other things) Or, do you just request it on a plane because you can and because you know we’ll make it, with a smile?
More articles by Bobby
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Airline Profile: American Airlines
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Booking an airline ticket? Do your research first!
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Flight Attendant Layover: Las Vegas
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Orlando...or No?
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The 1 Hour Day
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The InFlight Magazine
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Sleeping on a Plane: The Awkward Positions
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Say What? Passengers Say the Darndest Things!
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Sick Scheduling
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The Difference a Row Makes
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The Perks of Understanding & Appreciation
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Hotel Living: Your Home Away from Home
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Call Button Craziness
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Stuck in an airport? Lucky you.
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Pre-Flight Superstitions
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Dissecting Delays: What they Mean
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Flying High for the Holidays
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Heads Down! Stay Down!
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Boarding Blunders: Beat the Stress
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Middle Seat Matters
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Crew Camaraderie
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Air Emergency
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Commuting Crew
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Famous Flyers
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The Dirty Truth
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Flying First: Does Age Matter?
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The Flight Attendant Lifestyle
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Trip Report: New York to LA
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Notes from the Air
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The O.C.: The Onboard Conflict
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Cabin Common Sense
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Clearing the Air: Why FAs Do What They Do
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People Watching at Airports
This is probably one of the funniest posts I’ve ever read. I hung on each word as I read with glee. The ending was perfect! This is a hilarious look into “the other side” of airline travel that most customers don’t think of. I’d be interested if someone who has such ridiculous drink orders actually responds. I want to know the same question you ask. If the universe conspires and I get you as my flight attendant I will have to think of a clever drink order for you.
Hey Mark,
Thanks for the comment and the compliments! Start thinking of your drink order. It won’t be too long until I see you on board. As it is, I actually ran into another Flightster blogger, Colin, on board one of my flights a few months back.
It’s a small world!
Bobby
OMG Bobby….I would have handed them pen and paper to write it down and also given them a cup of ice and water to hold them over. That would give you time to get through the rest of first class pre-departure drinks. Then, when and if, you got to their weird ass drink I would have made three at a time in a shaker and kept it on hand, and ready,in the ice bin. As always you are way too nice! Hmmm…now why did I leave the airlines????? #880
Milk & Coke ??!!*
For real ?!- …WOW I never knew people were so…ahem, ‘precise’ with their drink orders aboard a plane*
Makes my orange juice requests sound rather boring!
Claudia
Yeah, here I’ve been feeling bad for making flight attendants dig around for the same “diet whatever” I drink at home!
Lemon, Lime and Bitters (aka LLB). In Australia, it’s a standard ‘I’m not drinking anything too alcoholic, because at some point I might be driving’ selection, and you can order it anywhere. It’s astonishing though, how many places (pubs, restaurants etc) in London, have no idea what it is.
The trick is to make sure that there’s a very small amount of Agnostura Bitters, so it’s not too alcoholic, a little lime cordial and lots of lemon (squash). Most of us who drink them will understand if you don’t have the bitters, but I was weirded out once when a barman said ‘I haven’t any lemon, but I can do you an orange OLB’!
Yes, I drink them at home. Bundaberg do them in a convenient bottle – straight from the fridge into my happy hands!
I’ve heard professional bartenders at peak times dumb down mix recipes to make them quicker to serve, dumping some ingredients.
In case of aircraft drink service, I’d say implement a policy to not serve any mixed drinks at all. You’re not a bartender, you don’t have the time for it nor the facilities.
Here’s the list of options we have stocked today, choose and be happy
Great post, the only time I’ve asked for an ‘unusual’ drink was on my flight to Peru I asked for Guarana which is a Peruvian soda. Not something readily available in the US, yet they didn’t have it but that is as odd as I get.
This reminds me of Jeff on the show Flipping Out. He’s a pain in the a** on the ground so I know he’s gotta be a pain in the air.
Milk and coke, huh? Yikes.
I avoid the fancy drinks in flight, and even though I enjoy mixed drinks on the ground, usually just have the wine in first class, or a coke in the rear
Milk and coke is a oldie. Laverne (on Laverne and Shirley) drank pepsi and milk, a drink that was put on the show because Penny Marshal drinks it in real life.
As for *my* drink order? It’s simple, seltzer, two limes, four pieces of ice. And, yes, that is indeed how I make it at home.
But don’t worry. I know you guys are busy, so I don’t get mad when it (as it usually does) gets served with one lime or two lemons or a full glass of ice. Just know that it makes me smile when you get it right.
I mostly ask for bloody mary mix, something pretty much every plane’s beverage cart will have handy, but something I almost never bother with at home. It’s better for me than a Coke (unless it’s one of the nasty chemical-laden ones with high fructose corn syrup), and more interesting than orange juice. I don’t normally bother springing for the $5 worth of vodka for it, but once in a while a friendly FA gives me a mini bottle to be nice!
On the plane, I make myself a drink in the summers- 1/2 diet sprite, 1/2 orange with a splash of cranberry. Would I ever ask another Flight Attendant for this? Nope.
Milk and Coke for real? I have never heard of that and hope I never do. Yuck! But, to each their own I guess…
A Woodford and diet (I tend to fly Delta) or just a plain diet. I’d never dream of being so specific, whether I’m in first or not!
Just fork over all the minis, let’s be honest here, people. The trays in First are big enough to open my own bar, right?
OMG! I’d never pull a stunt like that. The FAs are just too nice to mess with. For me, depending upon the time of day, it is any kind of charged mineral water, Diet Coke, black coffee or scotch rocks. Let’s keep it simple here ’cause I know that oyu have better things to do!
-Craig
That drink combo made me throw up a little in my mouth.. If never ceases to amuse me that whenever a passenger asks what you serve, and you rattle off ALL the possible offerings, they always opt for Coke.
I once had a passenger ask me for buttermilk! I couldn’t believe it.