Flightster

Notes from the Air

• by Bobby Laurie
• on July 30th, 2010
• 11 Comments

My last four day trip was my first time back to work in a little over two weeks. I needed the time off after working 14 days in a row. For anyone in a customer service position you need to have time away from the customer. That break allows you to re-group and re-center yourself before heading back into the field.

During my last trip I encountered some strange situations. Some of them struck me as odd, some as annoying and some that just made you say, “huh?” Luckily, although some of these situations annoyed me, I was able to never let on to the passenger that I was annoyed. That wouldn’t be proper customer service.

However, I’ve decided to put all of these situations together so that you can avoid being the subject of my next post. There are just some observations.

To parents: Play-dough should not be used by children on board an aircraft. It sticks to everything and gets everywhere. And no, I will not clean it up and, yes, I will be giving you a few cans of club soda and towels to do it yourself.

To passengers: Seriously. Lock the bathroom door when you get in there. I can’t believe how many times during a flight someone walks in on someone else unexpectedly. Lock The Door. I write about it a lot too and it’s starting to get on my nerves. I might have to include it in my announcements now or even demonstrate how to lock and un-lock the door.

To parents: In the middle of the flight it’s not okay to come up to the front of the aircraft from coach and ask if Little Baby Matthew can see the pilot. No one can see the pilot in flight. Further, don’t get annoyed with me when I tell you “no” and say “let me guess there’s a charge for that too.” Yes, in fact there is a charge for that. A charge of breeching the flight deck in flight. It comes with numerous years in prison and a hefty fine. Though you will get something free…free pat-downs every time you fly for the rest of your life.

To passengers: When you order a “cup of hot coffee, black” don’t be surprised when you get a cup of hot black coffee. In other words don’t ask “where’s the milk?” You didn’t ask for it.. We didn’t give it to you. When ordering coffee say what you want. If you want a coffee with cream and sugar say.. “May I please have a coffee with cream and sugar?”

To first class passengers: It’s okay to request that you eat your meal at a later time. However, don’t request to eat it the second the flight attendant serves the passenger next to you. Chances are they didn’t cook your meal so that it doesn’t get soggy and/or stale in the oven.

To coach passengers: It’s not okay to come to the first class to use the bathroom “because there’s a line in the back.” If everyone else in your cabin has to wait in line, you do too. You are not anymore important than they are and the rules still apply to you. To the back to the back to the back, back, back!

To passengers: Why is it when you order something from us (whether it be water, a coke or a meal) that you look surprised to receive it? Sometimes you even look around as if we read your mind and brought it to you before you ordered it. If that’s what you think, then yes.. I’m just that good. Keep believing it. Make sure to write a compliment letter to the company about how I “anticipated” your needs.

To passengers: We understand that sitting in those seats for 4-5-6 hours can be uncomfortable. However, when you come to the back to “stretch your legs” please don’t bend down in front of us so that your behind is right in our faces as we sit on our jumpseat (usually eating food). Further, please don’t stay back there for upwards of 10-20 minutes doing various stretching maneuvers. It’s not a yoga studio.It’s an aircraft galley.

To passengers: If you’re going to make a special request like: “I’ll have a coke, with one ice cube” or “I’d like a glass of ginger ale with a splash of cranberry, a lime and two ice cubes” the least you can do is say “please” and “thank you” when ordering and receiving your items. It goes a long way with the flight attendants and shows appreciation for the time that they took the time to special make your request.

Bobby Laurie

Bobby Laurie, author of the book Planely Speaking and television travel correspondent, currently works as a Flight Attendant at a low-cost airline and as a freelance journalist. After graduating from the Pennsylvania College of Technology with a degree in Mass Media Communication, Bobby combined his passion for both journalism and travel by writing about the travel industry through his insider knowledge and personal experiences. You can read Bobby's blog about being a flight attendant and the airline industry by visiting UpUpAndAGay.com.